Busted at Bedtime

Even though it seems that my kids are incapable of consistently using an alarm clock to get out of bed on time in the morning, at least bedtime around our house is pretty straightforward and efficient. I have definitely learned from past mistakes and therefore the bedtime routine has been streamlined more and more with each kid. It's similar to something I heard once about kids and baths: The first kid gets a bath every day, the second kid gets a bath a few times a week, and the third kid gets sent outside when it rains.

Zoe's bedtime lasts, on average, about five minutes. This includes occasionally flossing, always brushing, peeing, turning on the requisite nightlight and white noise, a quick kiss on the forehead and then shutting the door. (No, I do not actually lock it because some dreams are meant to remain just that: dreams.) Most of the time, she goes to sleep without a peep, but occasionally there is a plea for a glass of water or the need to kill an invisible bug that is supposedly lurking on her ceiling. Last night, however, falling asleep was delayed by a flying tea party.

**Just for clarification, Zoe hates most toys that are girly and I was shocked that she even allowed this tea party set in her room. But then I discovered that she doesn't host typical tea parties, judging by the fact that at one party, after Fluffy White Kitty repeatedly told Floppy Pink Bunny to eat her lunch, Fluffy White Kitty lost her temper and said "Just eat the freakin' food, stupid!" We're currently working on her hostess skills.

No sooner had I shut her door and plopped my ass on the couch when I heard a loud CRASH come from her room. Since it wasn't immediately followed by shrieks of pain, I knew that she was fine -- physically, anyway.

When I opened the door, she was sitting on her knees with her arms outstretched and her wood tea party set was scattered all over the floor. "Look at this! What a mess!" she proclaimed, like the tea party suddenly became animated all on it's own and went flying through the air.

After a few failed explanations that included phrases like "The saucer almost made me fall out of bed" and "I wasn't exactly jumping, more like moving up and down" she decided to play the crying card and burst into tears. I said yeah, well, you should probably quit crying because the only reason you're sad is because you got busted. She wailed "I know! I hate getting busted! Being busted is no fun!"

Since so many people have said things like "the apple doesn't fall far from the tree" and "like mother, like daughter," something tells me that this is not the last time I will be hearing this phrase from her.